Rats to Riches, or How and Why to Roll Executive Class in Macau

10:42 am - Executive Suite 1316 Sintra Hotel Macau China. In bathrobe. With wine


Oh Macau.

Macau. This, my friends, has been quite the experience. We arrived in Macau without a hotel room, under the impression (as we had read in our travel book and on various websites) that finding a nice hotel would be easy. Mondays are not busy here, and usually cheaper, and that it would be a breeze. What we didnt know was that the Grand Prix Formula #1 this weekend coming, and some massive convention and some Chinese festival. So we get here, with an idea of a place we want to check out. We take a taxi to the city centre and obviously we look confused. A nice english speaking woman comes up to us, helps us orient ourselves, and walks us to the street we are looking for. Everyone we speak to here that knows English has a relative or more in Canada. We get to the address, and go up 3 flights of dark stairs before Mikae says that he has had enough. We leave, and now need to go onto Plan B.

The tourist map we got at the ferry docks has a list of hotels and star ratings and addresses. By now, its getting late, and we are sweaty and tired. We head towards the closest hotel which is 2 star, and called Central Hotel. It is only steps away from the Largo do Senado, or the Portugeuse Style center, shopping, tourism, looks like a safe enough neighboorhood. Hotel looks fine from the lobby, so we check in. Costs us $250HKD or $35 dollars. We go upstairs and it looks fine. Shabby, could be cleaner, but great view of the ruins of St Pauls cathedral. We have a corner, so lots of air. Mikae has a shower while I take some photos and we go out to get a bite.

Macau is a very interesting city. VERY polluted. I have never experienced pollution like this before. My eyes have been burning, coughing, its awful. The traffic is completely insane. Taxis, busses, cars, and Thousands and Thousands of Scooters. There is zero regard for pedestrians and even at designated pedestrian crossings, the cars zoom through literaly dodging each other and the pedestrians. None signals, and I am sure there is no speed limit or restrictions. The public transportation is very cheap however, we took a city bus for 2.5MOP or 35 cents Canadian. The tourist areas are very nice, the casinos, well, Ill get to that later, but the rest of the city is crumbling. The living conditions are very poor. Very poor.

So we are wandering through the city, and we have gone the wrong way, not towards the tourist area, but towards where the locals live. I am getting really upset. The pollution, traffic, slums, I am hungry and tired, Mikae is not in a good mood either, and I am beginning to feel like I am trapped in this place that I hate. We turn around finally, walk to the city centre(where it gets a bit better) and find a Pizza Hut. Pizza Hut here is like a 5star restuarant. The menu has Lobster, and Norweigen Salmon, and Rack of Lamb. We order pizza and the girl looks at us like we are crazy. I make the mistake of ordering chillis on mine. I could barely even eat it, it was way way too spicy. Seriously, there was about 1.5 chilis per slice. The waiters spoke such poor english, I got onions instead of olives and I didnt even want to try to explian that I wanted some ceaser salad dressing to use as dip, so i ate as much as I could. The Canadian Style pizza had bacon, pepperoni and corn on it. Mikae has pepperoni pan pizza and a can of beer. The bill comes to $200+ or like $30. By far the most expensive meal in Asia so far. It was just as bad as Pizza Hut pizza back home as well. All of the people eating around us were Chinese, and they were all eating their chicken wings on forks.

Casinos. Macua really just doesn't have the same atmosphere as Las Vegas. Maybe the Chinese are just too reserved. Its not even remotely close in vibe. We visited several and they all fealt the same. Its not like Las Vegas where each casino has a remarkably different atmosphere. The first thing that was quite strange was the sound. Las Vegas is very noisy, with the sirens, coins, machines, people cheering etc. Macau, the casinos are SILENT. Silent. The machines have the sound turned off. The people are not cheering or laughing or even speaking. There is no music, with the exception of the Galaxy that had a live show. All of the girls, the hostesses, showgirls etc are asian, but super tall and super white-skinned. We think some might have been men but we are not sure. Its totally bizarre to see these 5foot11in women sofar at 5'3 I am usually avarage to tall in a crowd. In order to enter any casinos, you have to show your passport and pass through metal detectors. The aforementioned live show was hilarious. Totally campy. There was a “Chicago” number, a “Supremes” number and antoher where they dressed like nuns. All English songs. We left after a few minutes, its all we could handle. The Most amuzing part of the entire experience was not the show itself but the massive crowd of men gathered at the edge of the stage all watching the show instensely without expression. It looked like a rockshow, they were crowded around the stage, standing. We couldn't take any documentation, as cameras are forbidden.

The first casino we entered was the Wynn and we noticed right away that noone was drinking. Some people had bottled water, and there were no waitresses. I had been looking for a margarita, so we decided that at the next casino, we would hit the bar. So we did. They served the following options. Milk, Coffee, Orange Juice and Coca-Cola. Bottled water was free and stting on tables, you could just take. None of the casinos had any alcohol at all.

We wandered around a little more exploring the main square until we couldn't take it any longer. Both of us just didn't want to go back to the hotel. We get back to the hotel, and like everything else in Macau, in the daylight it looked one way and in the night its a totally different story. The hotel lobby is now packed with young girls, some ladyboys, and some sketchy looking characters. Noone is caucasian other than us. We take the elevator up to our room and each floor it opens and something fishy is going on. One floor has a bunch of girls sitting on the floor eating sunflower seeds and looking bored. Right in front of the elevator. One floor has these metal gates blocking off a section of the hotel. Everyone looks a little off, and we are getting concerned. We get back to the room and right in front of our door we see a massive bowl of rat poison pellets and rat droppings. In the dark the room looks terrifying. We wrap ourselves in the silk liners we have. Mikae takes a photo of me in mine, and loses it. He says it looks corpselike and he hates it here, and feels so uncomfortable and not safe, and that our parents wouldnt want us here and he doesnt think he can sleep. Its 10:30pm, so it will be a long night ahead of us. We get up and decide to get dressed and try to find another hotel.

As we head downstairs the situation just gets more uncomfortable, and we realize that basically, the entire building is a brothel and god knows what else. We are both really upset and decide that we are going to the only hotel we recognize, Best Western, and getting a room there no matter what.

Best Western hotel is called Best Western Sun Sun and was a short walk though the (crumbling) residential district. We run. They have a room avaliable, as it is very late we can have a small discount. The room comes to 902HKD or $126. Note that they charge Hotel tax of 10-15% here. We go upstairs to 1310 and it is just like home. It looks like every Best Western everywhere. We run back to Hotel Central to get our bags and book it. We were literally running. Mikae chucks the room keys on the counter at a very confused looking old chinese lady, and says something about we are leaving, keep the money etc. A scared looking White guy is just checking in. We run at breakneck speed up the winding streets to our new comfortable Best Western. Mikae gets a TsingTao beer and a small bottle of GraoVasco and a large bottle of water at the market next door for $32MOP or like $4. We get a nice hot shower and a nice comforatble sleep. We liked the Sun Sun, it gets terrible reviews on Trip Advisor, but we thought it wasn't bad.

In the morning we woke up happy, and went to go see the tourist spots before the crowds. We headed to the ruins of StPaul around 8 am which was the best idea, there were very few tourists there. St Pauls is the major tourist attraction in Macau. It burned down in the 1800s and they kept the facade. You can look at empty tombs, and climb up metal scaffolding on the back and look through the windows at the city. We wandered around the ruins of St Paul and the Mounte Forte next to it. It was beautiful and provdided excellent views of the city, 360degrees. On the way down we saw two old men and their three caged birds having a playdate. They were suspended from trees and were singing together. It really was the greatest thing. Such a beautiful experience in this city, so strange to compare it to the horrer of the night before. With tummys rumbling we went to find food. Macau's food selection is dismal. Portugeuse, Macausnese and Cantonese food is all very carnivorous. We opted for McDonalds breakfast. I had egg mcmuffin breakfast with surprisinglingly ok coffee and Mikae had pancake breakfast. Their margarine was made out of sweet corn. Corn is also a side dish at Mcdonalds in Macau. Upgrade to corn with margarine for 5pattacas. McDonalds Breakfast for two was about. $37 MOP or.. $5.20.